rip|TEAM

Last night at 10:30cst/11:30est the Inaugural running of the GTRe Whoopass Racing Season was completed. The race did not go down without incident. There were teams that showed up late because of unknown reasons. There were also teams that thought it would be ok to start the race with qualifying fuel loads. The race was restarted three times.

It was a very exciting race with a whole lot of mishaps, including the race leader spinning out on the last turn and still being able to maintain his lead because of poorly planned pit stops on behalf of the other whoopass teams. Mrkavanagh led the most laps of the race and was only briefly out of the lead. He finished the race with a large lead.

We are here with Mrkavanagh to ask him his feelings about his win.

Interviewer: Mrkavanagh how did you do it?
Mrkavanagh: First I would like to thank my sponsors, Slap yo Mama cajun spice, Diet Moutain Dew, and Pink Taco. Everyone is entitle to one Super crunchy Pink Taco because of yesterdays win.

Second I would like to thank Chitty who put in countless hours setting up his car and running many testing runs. At zero hour we realized we didn't know shit about setting up our car and decided that Chitty had a great setup and that it should not go to waste on a second class racer like himself. So when he wasn't looking we sent in our super spider monkey to steal the Dell laptop that contain his race setup. This is legal in the whoopass racing league under rule #62 - Whoopass racing members should not take there selves so dam seriously and rule #107(KISS) Keep it simple stupid.

Interviewer: How did you become such a great driver?
Mrkavanagh: I read a lot of Dr. Sueus books as a kid.

Interview: mmmkay. What did you think of your competitors including the other whoopass members?
Mrkavanagh: Other drivers? Shit, I didn't know there was any one else out there with me! I looked at it like I was running my own race out there and they were just there to fill in the field and contribute to my winnings.

Interviewer: What are you going to do to prepare for the next race?
Mrkavanagh: Well I will take the week off drink lots of Diet Mountain Dew, eat a lot of Pink Tacos and wait until zero hour and let super spider monkey do his job when needed.

Interviewer: Any final words for your fans and fellow drivers?
Mrkavanagh: Here's the deal I'm the best there is. Plain and simple. I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence. I'm too drunk to taste this chicken.

 

Excellent.

We'll see what Chitty's Trunk Monkey has to say about the Spider Monkey ... let the Monkey-race begin!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4HfMUGsniJ8 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4HfMUGsniJ8)

Wow, I literally had someone come in my office and ask me what I was laughing about Kav.  Nicely done.

thanks chitty